Ever needed a compelling reason never to start a blog? Something to show friends as if to suggest: “seriously, don’t start a blog—you’ll be doing shit like this within a month” ? Well then friends, Rickey has the perfect meme for you. Unlike the previous one we participated in, this one is purely random, and therefore doesn’t revolve around Rickey talking about himself. And that’s a low down dirty shame if you ask us. So thanks to Mike, Rickey has been tagged for the following meme and is now required to begrudgingly:
1. Grab the nearest book (Reading? You fool! Rickey don't read.)
2. Open to page 123. (What? And you think Rickey can count?)
3. Go down to the 5th sentence.
4. Type in the following 3 sentences.
5. Tag five people. (No.)
So away we go! The book Rickey reached for is called “On Ugliness” compiled by Umberto Ecco, and it was a Christmas gift from Rickey’s father. We’ve actually been looking for an excuse to talk about this bizarre book for a while now. It’s essentially a catalogue of all things obscene, repugnant, frightening, monstrous, and repellent--here’s what the NYTimes had to say about it:
“[in this book] you will be hard pressed to find a facet of ugliness that does not rear up in some hilarious, obscene, disgusting or terrifying form.”
It’s essentially the “Freaks” book that Larry David buys as a birthday gift for Ted Danson in an episode of “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” So, uh, thanks again for the uplifting Christmas gift dad! For a little background, Rickey’s dad is a man who once brought back a shot glass and a rubber mouse for Rickey from a business trip. And this was when Rickey was eight. At this point, none of us have any clue whether or not the man is purposefully fucking with Rickey. He’s got to be, right? (Actually, Rickey made out well all things considered—Rickey’s younger brother was befuddled to receive a book on how pencils are made and a child’s sized Brooklyn Knights t-shirt from Old Navy this past Christmas).
Anyhow, getting back to the meme at hand, Rickey flipped this strange book open to page 123, and here’s what Rickey beheld:
No text, just a picture of a strangely disconcerting beastie (and believe us, this is one of the tamer pictures featured in the book). Is it a Muppet? Is it the Cloverfield monster? Is it Cthulhu? Rickey doesn’t know, but here’s what Rickey has learned from this meme: one of the benefits of being a parent is that you are provided with the opportunity to completely mess with your kids’ heads. There’s something wonderfully twisted about procuring books for your children that contain the following picture:
Nightmare fuel anyone? Anyhow, since most of the folks in Rickey’s blogging circle of friends have already been tagged for this meme, we’ll take pity on you folks and not tag anyone at all. The shenanigans end here at RwR, the alpha and omega of pointless fuckwittery such as this. Besides, you witless oafs have better things to do than read, yes? The printed word is dead! Dead, we say!
[posted at Humor Blogs, balls deep in memes since 2006!]