Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Notes from the Citi Field Groundskeeping Crew, Following Last Night's Game:

1) Apparently building a stadium five feet to the left of the old one wasn't enough to divert us from under the LaGuardia and JFK flight paths. Whoops.

2) Paint entire section of right field walls in warm, soothing colors. Gary Sheffield will be out there Wednesday. Gary Sheffield's mental well being is very important to us.

3) Remove magical talisman buried under pitchers mound causing HEATH BELL to pitch above expectations.

4) DO NOT acquiesce to Mike Piazza's demands that he be given the cell phone number of the lead male vocalist of "West Side Story."

5) Double supplies at Shake Shack. Doc Gooden loves him some shakes.

6) Call ANIMAL CONTROL. Come on people, cats living in Queens is downright unnatural.

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Smitty said...

I'm still bitter you stole Sheffield from us. I hope he strikes out constantly.

George said...

Smitty, you can have Sheffield back. Just send Cabrera and we'll call it even.

Ms. Henderson said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rickey Henderson said...

Yeah, thanks a million for a DH who's 20 pounds overweight and has an attitude problem. Watch out for that guy. Rickey's typing this just having watched Sheffield strike out at his first at bat as a Met.

Alex said...

who wants to know what the misses said??

Sully Sullivan said...

Hey it's been a while.

How are those Mets looking this year? My Jays are off to a flying start, we just whooped Minnesota tonight.

Rickey Henderson said...

Alex: Ms Henderson didn't say anything actually--her google account was logged in on Rickey's laptop and Rickey accidentally posted as her. This happens at least once a month.

Sully: so if the Blue Jays win but nobody shows up at the stadium to watch it happen, did it even occur in the first place?

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