Thursday, February 5, 2009

Yet Another Reason to be Concerned About Global Warming

Via USA Today, we are brought word of a terrifying beastie that was slithering about the planet 58 million years ago: the titanboa, which we're assuming is Latin for "holy fucking shit, run away from that gigantic snake!" A relative of the modern day anaconda, this massive bastard grew to be the length of a city bus. It's trunk would have reached a person's hips. It ate alligators. Whole. Somebody is probably scripting a crummy SciFi Channel movie about it at this very moment (right after "Wyvern" and "Raptor"!). Being a snake, it thrived in the warm prehistoric climate, so with our current climate change trend, it's entirely plausible that this limbless reptilian nightmare could make a comeback. No word yet from scientists on the possibility of genetically engineering some sort of mega-mongoose to combat this terrifying menace.

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11 comments:

Harris said...

Actually, I think Sci-Fi already has about 50 hours worth of original sci-fi giant snake flicks

think i've seen them all (at least i'll be prepared)

harris

Smitty said...

What was that giant snake movie with Ice Cube?

Adam said...

This has me thinking- perhaps if I increase the temperature in my trousers... ya think?

Smitty said...

perhaps if I increase the temperature in my trousers

Brilliant. Nobel-prize brilliant.

Alex L said...

I like the idea of a giant mongoose... do you think we could saddle them for riding.

Chris C said...

You always see those shows on cable about people getting eaten by snakes a third that size.

Maybe there were humans way back when but they all were eaten by giant snakes.

steves said...

What was that giant snake movie with Ice Cube?

Anaconda.

Adam said...

Rickey, where's our obligatory A-Fraud post? Duuuuude!

Doug at Taunt Vortex said...

"Snakes on a Plane" was a total flop... but perhaps if they re-tool, use this prehistoric snake and call it "Snake Ate a Plane!"

Smitty said...

Anaconda

Yes! My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hon.

Kirsten said...

GROSS!!
I don't really know what else to say!