Not content with discussing our nation's steady regression into a predominantly bartering society, Rickey has opted to delve into something far more pressing: President Barack Obama's BlackBerry useage. If the media deems it newsworthy that the leader of the Free World has opted to use a device that the majority of corporations have already adopted four years ago, then we figure we can take the hilarity to new and exciting levels....
POTUS: Yo, Hilzoy! What's shakin?
EVERGREEN: (it's her codename, we looked it up) I'M IN UR ASIA, STEALIN UR THUNDA!
POTUS: LMFAO! Ahhhhh, good stuff. So ur wrapping things up over there? Makin us look good?
EVERGREEN: Yeah, I think I can get China to spot us a few xtra tril. 2.5 FTW! Didn't u read mah twitter?
POTUS: Meh, I don't have time for that. Keep the twittering to a few words or a sentence at most--it's all I have time for in between breakfast and teh gym.
EVERGREEN: R people back home still flipping out about me not ragging on China for their human rights problems?
POTUS: Nah, it's all good, I explained it to 'em in mah weekly JibJab address to teh nation.
EVERGREEN: OMG WTF BBQ.
POTUS: Everything OK?
EVERGREEN: Yeah, stupid Bill keeps tagging me in that "25 Random Things" note on Facebook. Shouldn't he know all this stuff by now? FAIL spouse knows only failure. ...BTW, how r things going stateside?
POTUS: Pretty great--we should have Citibank and Bank of America nationalized by teh end of teh week. These n00bs in Congress can't stop me. They can only hope to contain me.
EVERGREEN: O RLY? You sure that turning everybody's local banks into DMV offices is a good idea?
POTUS: Nationalized Banks > Zombie Banks, IMHO.
EVERGREEN: And if that doesn't work?
POTUS: I'll edit all the banks' wikipedia pages to make them appear profitable. Instant pwnage.
EVERGREEN: ROTFL, we must not allow our irrational exuberance to govern our actions! \Greenspann'd
EVERGREEN: All your vote are belong to us!
EVERGREEN: So has the the GOP been gettin u down?
POTUS: Kinda, but I've been distracting them by signing them up for emails offering che@p v1agr@.
EVERGREEN: Argh, HRWM2RTIOBTSPVMS!
POTUS: HRWM2RTIOBTSPVMS = ???
EVERGREEN: HRWM2RTIOBTSPVMS = Harry Reid Wants Me 2 Research The Idea of Bringing These Schoolgirl Panties Vending Machines Stateside.
POTUS: GTFO, you use that phrase a lot?
EVERGREEN: Fifth time today. Dude won't leave me alone.
POTUS: What do these machines look like?
EVERGREEN: I posted a pic of one to my Flickr album.
EVERGREEN: Nah, very NSFW.
POTUS: I'll check it out when I figure out how to get around the filters here at work. Text me when u land in D.C., K?
EVERGREEN: Yep. Hopefully my n00b pilot won't try another corkscrew landing... TTYL.