Friday, November 30, 2007

Just in Case You'd Forgotten How Geeky Rickey Is...

You know what the best part of a week long head cold is? It grants you the freedom to say things like “Sorry sweetie, but I can’t possibly wash the dishes in my weakened state, so I’m just going to ride this cold out on the couch with a nonstop Halo marathon.” Dating a nurse has its bonuses: the primary one is they she goes into nurse mode and is totally cool whenever Rickey gets sick and lazy. Indeed, we scored.

And while relaxing on the sofa and using only his opposable thumbs and lesser brain functions, Rickey decided to experiment with the snapshot function in Halo 3 that we previously mentioned. Behold, spectacular photographic evidence of Rickey blowing shit up! (We know, you're probably wondering: "and this betters humanity how exactly?" Look, baby steps people. Rickey will discuss our crippling dependence on foreign oil tomorrow).

But today, take a gander at the pretty pictures! Look, strange alien worlds! Bombast! Explosions! Large codpieces! And all in glorious high resolution!

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So maybe it’s a little geeky, but we figure that if Rickey is going to share some pictures of his hobbies with you folks, those pictures should feature vivid explosions. Is there anything that fireballs can’t improve? We’re gonna say “no.” Look for an upcoming post featuring Rickey’s other hobby (drinking) with some fireballs photoshopped in for good measure. Look, it’s more interesting than posting pictures of one’s dog.

Sadly, if Rickey put as much time into actual photography as he did into this silliness, he’d probably be the next Ansel Adams by now. But hey, it frankly doesn’t matter whether he’s using a free floating camera in a virtual environment or a canon powershot in the real world. We think that Rickey definitely has a photographer’s eye. And that brings us to the following conversation that Rickey had a few nights ago while chatting with a Halo buddy.

Rickey: “Hey dude, want to play a game?”

Anonymous Xbox Live Dude: “Uh, no, something has come up. I’m busy right now.”

Rickey: “Doing what?”

Anonymous Xbox Live Dude: “I’m working on something.”

Rickey: [slight pause] “Care to elaborate?”

Anonymous Xbox Live Dude: “Something big.”

Rickey: “Alright then, good luck with that. Later.”

And then, a few hours later in the evening, Rickey receives the following image from the same guy:

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Apparently, what you're looking at is a recreation of the Iwo Jima Memorial within the Halo universe. The guy rounded up a bunch of friends online, had them arrange themselves in just the right poses, then took a hi-res snapshot of it to share with the world. Well that’s one way to show your patriotism we suppose. Screw boring old 35mm film, imagine if Clint Eastwood had chosen this tableau to work with for “Flags of our Fathers”?

And if that wasn’t terrifying enough, take a gander at this:

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Yep, the poor bastard arranged all the weapons on the level to spell out his marriage intentions. Now that is unfortunate. Somewhere, the hairs on the back of Ms. Henderson’s neck just stood up ever so slightly…

Update: we've just been informed that a Halo themed cosplay wedding is strictly off limits. No word on the possibiliy of having Mr. Met ordain the ceremony however.

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4 comments:

Smitty said...

Smitty firmly believes that all things are made better with explosions. ANd let me say that the real ones are just as cool as the virtual ones. Just, you know, way more dangerous.

If they ever make combat body armor to look and protect like Halo armor, Smitty will reenlist.

I have seen some pretty dorky marriage proposals (Smitty's excluded). This one is easily in the top 5. But who am I to stand in the way - and be critical of - love?

Adam said...

This doesn't quite suffice with a marriage proposal, but a couple of years ago, I had to go to a wedding for a HS friend of mine and he sang "If Ever I Would Leave You" from CAMELOT to his newly wedded wife. In front of the whole goddamn wedding.

"
If ever I would leave you,
How could it be in spring-time?
Knowing how in spring I'm bewitched by you so?
Oh, no! not in spring-time!
Summer, winter or fall!
No, never could I leave you at all!"

Now, me? I spent the whole evening outside with the valet guys drinking scotch and smoking cigarettes at a breakneck speed. Holy shit, that was a tough night.

RJ said...

I wish I had that kind of time.

I'n not kidding. I really wish I had more time to do things exactly like that. I barely have time to play video games at all these days, let alone create hi-res screenshots of stuff blowing up.

Keep living the dream, Ricky...

Rickey Henderson said...

The song from Camelot, huh? That's tough. Still it's infinitely better than singing the theme song to Armageddon.

And rj: taking the pics took very little time actually--Rickey spent much more time trying to figure out how the hell to host them on imageshack and load them to blogger.