Thursday, June 14, 2007

This is where Rickey posts recommendations of noteworthy consumables, practices, and pastimes that have been deemed invaluable for the reader’s betterment. All products and advice listed herein have been Rickey tested and approved. Again, this is in no way shape or form a complete rip off of McSweeney’s (fa-la-la-la-la, lawyers, Rickey can’t hear you). Enjoy this week’s installment of

RICKEY RECOMMENDS:

Registering a domain name entitled “Shea Stadium Suicide Hotline.” Pessimist that he is, Rickey’s dreading the horror that’s going to transpire this weekend in the Bronx. But on the plus side, now that the wheels are falling off the Mets bandwagon, finding good seats at Shea this summer might no longer be a daunting challenge. We know, we know, it’s not that bad, blah, blah, blah… Just let us be moody about this, ok? The main advantage to being a pessimist is that you get to be pleasantly surprised when you’re wrong.

Skyauction. It’s like Ebay, but rather than bidding on fake designer jeans and obscure region two DVD imports, you bid on vacations. This is how Rickey and Ms. Henderson wrangled a week in July at the Mt. Washington Hotel in Bretton Woods, NH. Good times will be had when Rickey gets severely inebriated and performs an interpretive dance rendition of the United Nations Monetary and Financial Conference of 1944.

Owning a wok. Because cooking up stir fry for dinner is easy, fun, and makes you look mildly sophisticated. The jury is still out in the Henderson household on the merits of stir fried tofu however.

Locating and visiting your nearby wineries. This adds to that whole sophistication thingy we were talking about in the previous recommendation. Bonus points if you seriously lose your shit and perform your Paul Giamatti impression from “Sideways.”

Downloading the single “Missed the Boat” by Modest Mouse. Now we’re not huge fans of Modest Mouse’s style, but every now and then they pull together a little ditty that makes you want to get up and dance around (i.e. “Float On”). “Missed the Boat” is one such song. It’s a terrific little anthem—listen to it, and by all means recommend it to others.

“Heart of the City (Ain’t No Love)” by Jay-Z. Yeah, you read that right, Rickey’s recommending Jay-Z. It’s kind of a shame that they apparently teach multiple fake retirements at “The School of Hard Knocks”… Anyway, we’re not sure who the jazz singer is that Jay-Z samples in this song, but they’re pretty damn good. Soulful even. Rickey likes to listen to this song while straight up illin'.

[And now that we’ve scared away our two African American readers, let’s proceed onwards.] Rickey also recommends:

Ajax Ruby Red Dish Liquid. A buddy informed Rickey about this stuff, which is apparently not only great for washing the hands with, but also kosher. We’re a little perturbed by the fact that we’re washing our hands with a product with a label stating “keep out of reach of children,” but you know what? We don’t fucking care.

Who's Harry Crumb? Simply put, this criminally underrated comedy features John Candy at his peak. Plus it features Jeffrey Jones's second best pre-child molestation charges performance, behind only “Stay Tuned.” Pick this flick up post-haste.

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6 comments:

Egan Foote said...

Egan Recommends:

Finding episodes of "The Nine" on YouTube. Skip ahead to parts featuring me, Egan Foote.

iPod ads showing hairy vaginas.

Getting sweaty at the gayest gym in NYC.

Medical marijuana in New York State.

Ricky spelling his name correctly on one blog, but spelling it incorrectly on the blog you are currently reading.

The home for all things Egan.


Egan, out.

Rickey Henderson said...

So is it a good thing or a bad thing that this blog has grown to the point of attracting members of the fringe nutjob community?

Smitty said...

Locating and visiting your nearby wineries

Uh...I think you meant brewery not winery. Or at least tell me that's what you meant.

Rickey Henderson said...

Uh yeah, that's what Rickey meant.

Look, once he gets going, Rickey will drink anything that contains alcohol. Beer just happens to be his primary choice if he's in a reasonable frame of mind.

Ms. Henderson's Sister said...

Try the song "Dashboard" by Modest Mouse. I'm a huge fan of the band and this song also makes you want to get up and dance...that and drive fast. haha

Mr Furious said...

"Your eyes...they play tricks on me."

My roommate and I got a lot of mileage out of Harry Crumb and its dialogue back in the day...