Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Your 24 Roundup

As this season of “24” stumbles to the finish line, Rickey will once again strap on his adult diaper and crank out a write up on this week's mildly thrilling episode of “24.” So sit back, relax (well, as much as humanly possible while watching this show) and enjoy the ridiculous plot twists. Eh, look, it could be much worse—you could be a “Star Trek” geek and be faced with the dilemma of deciding which crappy spin-off series to follow. (Or do you have to follow all of them?) Ugh, anyway, count your blessings. Below are several brief thoughts on Monday’s show:

  • Can we get by just one season without a CTU breach? Honestly now, it’s easier to get into than Lisa Miller's pants. Climb in the sewers, blow up a grate, and hello everybody, here we are! Completely ridiculous.

  • Rickey finds it fantastic that the writers seem to have totally given up and essentially told Powers Boothe: “You know what? Just act like that Deadwood guy and glower a lot, ok?”

  • It’s only been a few short weeks since Data from “The Goonies” went crazy at VA Tech. Did it absolutely have to be a group of gun wielding Asians that stormed CTU? Too soon “24” writers, too soon…

  • Nadia? Still quite hot (even under duress).
  • We now know why the writers of “24” brought Milo back. So they could kill off another series regular. Oddly enough, his death had no emotional impact whatsoever… And on the plus side, we now get to watch Nadia dating Mike Doyle while trying her hardest not to laugh at the fact that she’s hooking up with a character played by Ricky Schroeder.

  • And was anyone else predicting that Chloe was the person the Chinese were after? Think about it—Chloe gets kidnapped & tortured, agrees to help the terrorists, thus leveling the playing field between her and Morris and allowing them to get back together again. Sure it’s silly, but it would’ve been more probable than Jack’s kid being the target.

  • Rickey is calling it now: after remembering that he left his jade plant and “succeed” poster back at CTU, Bill Buchanan will return to the office and use his decisive management skills to save the day. (Rickey and Ms. Henderson have vowed to stop watching the show if they don’t bring back Bill next week).

And so goes another sub par episode of “24.” Saddened? No worries, Rickey knows how to salvage the season. It involves the return of Tony, six wolves, a ray gun that allows people to levitate large objects (which then explode), and the murder of Jack Bauer followed by the introduction of the Jack Bauer cloning lab where eighteen Jack Bauers have been growing in tubes, and three of which are evil!

In all seriousness, the current rumor is that next season they reboot “24” and ship it off to NYC. Sounds promising. The potential downside to doing this is that the 5pm to 6pm hour would involve Jack stuck in traffic for an hour on the L.I.E:

“Jack, there's a jackknifed tractor trailer ahead. Ten mile delay!”

“Dammit!”

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5 comments:

TheJackSack said...

I want a talking horse to be introduced as well. (Please, no Audrey jokes).

Tony coming back would redeem the whole damn season. Bill Buchanan throwing on a red bandana and belts of ammuniction would be even better.

Anonymous said...

Bill's coming back. He gave an interview earlier this season to someone (can't remember where I read it) saying he would be doing some field stuff for the first time. He and Jack are going rogue, I think. That's worth the price of admission.

Rickey said...

You just made my day Amy.

Your Friendly Neighborhood Clark Bar said...

A reboot is necessary. I think it'd be pretty cool if the ditched the domestic angle altogether. Put Jack back into the DOD or some made up intel agency so he can do his thing in the Middle East or someplace like that.

Anonymous said...

what if jack joins a waterskiing show and has to jump over a pool filled with sharks?

woops! already done that this year